I woke up at four this morning to watch him leave for the airport. It wasn't on the best of terms. We weren't really fighting, things were just off between us. I suppose it is because life has been so incredibly hectic lately. It has been difficult to find our time. I tend to be selfish in that respect, I see our time as a priority. When we go too long without it, I take personal offense. I'm not talking sex or anything like that. Just he and I being us. It has been really hard to find time to be us lately. Time where we don't discuss schedules, kids, work or the house. When we goof off and have fun.
Sometimes I get resentful, because I am the one left at home with the kids. I am the one doing homework, breaking up fights, trying to put the baby to bed, and clean the house while he is hanging out in a hotel room. Then, after everything calms I realize he is doing his job and I am doing mine. I realize that even though I am dealing with the chaos, he is lonely and missing his family. As hard as it is on us, it is just as hard on him.
The husband will be back tomorrow night. Since it is summer, the kids will be up and will greet him at the door. I will wait my turn for his attention. Eventually, when the last of the brood passes out, we will hopefully find some us time.