There are some days that I just wake up and I am ready for it to be bedtime. I feel so horribly guilty wishing the day gone, but jeez. Kids are bouncing off the walls, fights are breaking out and my brain is about to bleed. At the end of the day, I look back and I realize how fast every day goes. My oldest is now a teen, my only girl has been here for a decade, and my baby is a toddler. Time flies by and you have no control. 
     It seems like yesterday that I was a teenager, and here I am approaching middle age. When did this happen? I just don't get it. I feel like somewhere, someone hits a fast forward button when I am not paying attention. Then there are those days. The ones that feel never ending. The ones where the baby refuses to sit in the grocery cart, so he runs away from me anytime I get near him in the store. The ones where each time I talk to oldest, he wants to sass back and give me that teenager attitude. The days where middle child accuses me of ruining her life every other minute. Those days cannot go quick enough. 

     I feel so guilty for wishing even those days gone. I am so lucky. I have the most amazing life. My kids are honestly in the top ten percent of the least annoying children anywhere. They may fall near the bottom of that ranking, but I am pretty fond of them, regardless. There are those perfect days where I look at my kids and I just want to freeze them in all of their perfection. I see my oldest, in his awkward, funny teenage youth. His smile is always present, and he is never afraid to give me a hug even when we are in public. I never want that to change. He is my best friend.
     My beautiful middle child is just amazing. She is always ready to challenge anything I say, no matter the situation. She is going to be my little lawyer. Middle child never backs down. She is very much like me. Even when she is bummed out and feeling low, she still gives it her all. That little girl is my hero. 
     Then there is youngest. There are times I wonder what I was doing, starting over. Then I look at him. The child is absolute perfection. He is so happy all of the time. The little boy can be so bad, yet he makes everyone around him laugh. He is my little star. 
     I want to keep all of them like this forever. I am so sad the days go by so quick. each day that seems neverending is just a quick memory. It is just so sad to watch your kids grow. I have learned to embrace it, and to love each day for what i tis. There are some days I still need my mommy time outs, and I want to run for the hills screaming, but I don't. I have also learned to quit wishing them away so often. I think it is the fact that my little guy isn't a baby anymore, he is an independent toddler. My little girl is always reminding me that she is almost a teenager. Then, I realize I only have a few short months until my oldest is driving. I stop wishing even the worst days away and embrace each and every one. I want my kids to be mine, for this short, little while. 


02/23/2015 3:57pm

I love this post! I feel the same way most days though, so I completely understand! Enjoy every moment even if they suck- thats my motto <3

02/23/2015 4:48pm

Time goes by so quick and yes those middle teen years can be horrible, but as they age and you age the relationships change. You will always be mom and they will most always look to you for advice but you become not just a parent but a friend. Us aging sucks though lol because you don't feel any older and in your mind you don't look any older. Just a few gray hairs or crows feet but all of a sudden you are looking at people your age and going OMG when did they get old. I had that kind of a moment last night watching Sean Penn on the Oscars. We are the same age, I remember him in Fast Times at Ridgemont High when it was in the theatre. And when he married Madonna and what an asshole I thought he was back then. I saw him last night and holy moly he is old now which means so am I. Thats a scary revelation. But hang in there with the kiddos. It does go quick and suddenly you are home alone wishing you could go back to those days. xoxoxoxo

02/27/2015 10:22am

It really is so bittersweet! I feel just the same way...some days you just want to rip your hair out and others you just want time to slow down. I know it all goes so quickly, but sometimes it feels like you can just barely make it to bedtime and you feel so fried. I can totally relate!

Jennifer Shelton
03/08/2015 9:39pm

I can so relate to this! There are days when I am ready for bedtime, but then there are days I look at my babies and realize that I am so blessed!

03/16/2015 3:54am

As a mom of 3 amazing kids, 2 of which that are grown and out of the house and my last one who is 16 is still at home, I am here to tell you that they grow up way too fast! You blink and they are in High School! My best advice is to cherish them , even during those annoying teenage years!! Leave the housework for another day and go out side and get dirty with your kids! Swing with them on the swing set! I sit now and am thankful that I took the time to just "be" with my kids! The best part, THEY are thankful looking back on those times we shared!!

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