A few years ago, I chose to be a stay at home mom. I left a career to be with my kiddos full time, and never once looked back. There are days after I made the choice, that I would feel empty. There are only so many times you can vacuum the living room or polish the bathroom sink. My husband would get home from work, and I would wait for him to tell me how amazing the house looked or how great dinner was. For a while, I was content with that being the only approval I got. I spent my days checking homework and reading books with the children. I was pregnant with youngest, so I knew it was not going to get easier. I also knew that going back to work was not in my foreseeable future. Eventually, craft time and chores left me feeling empty. I felt like I lost myself somewhere along the way. I was the kiddo's mommy, and my hubby's wife. I didn't feel like me. I didn't like how it felt. 

     I am not saying that I did not love being a mom or a wife, I loved it. Spending time with my children was, and is the highlight of each and every day. Unlike most parents who dread summer, I welcome it, because my kids are home full time. I simply needed more fulfillment for myself. Dinnertime would come, and the kids would talk about their day. My husband would talk about work. I had nothing. It made me feel so left out. I don't have a way to explain it, other than that really. 
     That is how I started this. Nonperfect Parenting was born out of a necessity to find my voice again. I needed somewhere to not just be a mommy, or a wife, but to do what I am good at...being me. I am still able to be a stay at home mom, but now I have a way to express myself and have an outlet. I still spend my days reading with children or playing blocks. Now my floors aren't nearly as clean and my bathroom hasn't been polished in months. I am happier because I have found something I enjoy and I love. I suppose the point of all of this is, even if you are a SAHM, you must find an outlet for yourself. Don't lose yourself and only be a mommy or a wife. It is important to still be that individual you were before the chaos of a family happened. It helps you to cope with it daily. 


04/21/2015 6:56pm

Oh, Tre....Thank you for this.... I feel that I've lost myself, too. I get up, go to work, come home, watch my husband nap, cook dinner, do laundry or dishes....Just like everyone else with or without a family. But I see him, sleeping, napping as if there isn't a care in the world and I'm like, "Why can't I just STOP and fall asleep where I sit? If I'm sitting, I should be DOING something productive. I still haven't found the "THING" that makes me find myself. Still stumbling through. But all I can do is keep on keeping on.
I appreciate all that you do....Perfect or NonPerfect! You put such an effort into you blogging, giveaways and product reviews. And, somehow, you still manage to show us pictures of your life, your kiddos, your hubby, etc.... I'm in awe of you. You inspire me to keep looking for the "thing". If nobody else says it, (or doesn't say it enough,) I APPRECIATE YOU! :)

04/21/2015 7:31pm

I have so been here before. I love being able to blog and get to know others. I know exactly how this feels and feel so much better having my running and my blog work just for me. Thanks for sharing. You are amazing.

Marya Mann
04/21/2015 10:59pm

Wow. This couldn't have been written at a more perfect time. I have felt so lost and the same exact way. I do enjoy being a SAHM but I feel like I've lost me somewhere in there and hope to find me soon. You are inspirational. Thank you!

04/23/2015 1:30pm

I know how you feel Tre. I worked everyday for over 32 years. We commuted 2 hours each way so our kids would have a nice house in a decent neighborhood. Nights were homework, dinner, dishes and then bed only to get up and do it all again. My weekends were laundry, vaccuming, bathroom cleaning, basically everything I couldn't do during the week and I felt like I had no life. Then my life changed so drastically when the kids were grown. I divorced the husband who had been abusive all those years. I moved away from my kids who were adults. I lost the business I had built up and bought a foreclosed home out in the most rural of areas so I would have something paid for that was mine. I had a new life, a new man, and no work. Yep, you can only do so much laundry, watch so much tv, clean so many toilets before the emptiness sets in. I like you turned to blogging and product reviews and it almost feels like a full time job again except I can do it in my jammies if I so choose. Hang on to every second of the kiddo time because once its all done it is all done. Another chapter opens and you become the grandma that spoils the grandkids rotten but it is not the same. You my dear can never lose yourself. You are such an amazing lady and I am in such a debt to you. When you start feeling that way again come ring my bell :) I'll be there to pump you up again.

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