It’s always tough when your spouse travels for work.
     In fact - it’s not something that gets easier. You’d think it would, really. You’d think that you’d adapt, feel more at ease, find a way to skip over the missing days with some sense of normality. As anyone who has ever lived with a traveling spouse will know… that just doesn’t happen. You adjust and make the adaptations you need, but really, you’re waiting again for the door to open once more and the excited shouts of: “Daddy’s home!”
     So rather than being totally fine and at ease with things, all you can strive for is making things as bearable as possible. There are a few tricks you can use to make the distance feel as small as possible, and allow you to click in and out of a routine when the long nights separated from one another feel like they’re going to go on forever.
#1 - Keep Him With You
     Sense memory is a powerful thing. One sniff of the air of a familiar place and we can be transported back in our memories, feeling more in touch with our past than mere words or even pictures can provoke.
     So while it’s natural to fill your home with sights of your husband while he’s away - photographs, framed pictures - it’s also important to focus on the power of scent to trigger happy, soothing thoughts. This can be by burning a candle with a fragrance you associate with him. A few ideas for relevant fragrances:
  • If you eat outside in the springtime surrounded by garden flowers, you can trigger those memories by choosing a honeysuckle fragrance.

  • If you have memories of looking after your little ones with your spouse, then you can find candles fragranced to smell like freshly washed clothes or even baby powder! 
  • So long as it’s a happy memory, by attaching a scent to it, you can feel a little more grounded. 
#2 - Keep Him In Mind
This one takes a little bit of practice, but it’s worth doing.
     If an issue - such as school fees or any of the usual admin side of life - crops up while your husband is away, your first instinct might be to discuss it with him during your nightly catch-up. However, if the matter can wait, then it’s worthwhile just leaving it be.
     For every business trip, keep a small notebook full of ‘little things’. This can be boring tasks like admin, but you can also fill it with fun anecdotes and questions. Did your kids say something funny? Did you think of a question you’re sure he would know the answer to? Were you reminded of something you did together? Jot it all down in the a notebook and he can leaf through it when he returns, connecting all the parts of your life together.
#3 - Look For Experiences
     When we’re away from home, we all have a tendency to think what we have left behind. It’s impossible to know what your husband misses about home; it might be the simple routine of home life or a specific thing that makes him smile.
     When birthdays and Christmases roll around, it might be tempting to invest in gifts that serve as a reminder of home. Perhaps you’d look at luggage tags, portable pillows, photo frames he can use to decorate a hotel room - all little touches of home.
     Valuable and sentimental as those gifts can be, the best gift you can give is experiences. A nice luggage tag or passport wallet is transitory in its enjoyment. If your husband has a wonderful, refreshing memory to turn over in his mind, then that’s going to last a lot longer. There are plenty of cool gifts for men that allow for experiences over material possessions and can bring you all together. You can then reinforce the point by giving trinket gifts such as mugs or even a pillowcase featuring photos from the day out, to be taken with him when he goes away. It ticks both boxes and gives you some valuable family time to make memories you can all treasure.
     So while your spouse traveling often doesn’t get any easier, you can make it more bearable with a few small adaptations that let you make the most of the situation. And just remember: with every said goodbye, you’re setting the clock for a joyous reunion in the future. Something to look forward to and sustain you through the long days apart.
 


Comments

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